Shabby Miss Jenn

Friday, 15 August 2008

Who's happy it's Friday?

Oooh now that would be me....rofl! It has been another full on and busy week and I am tired but the good news is I've just finished a LO I started earlier this evening and it's the weekend finally.

I had the most gorgeous gift given to me yesterday when I was RAK'ed by Hollie (Holliewood Studios) a very talented designer over at Oscraps. It really meant the world to me and so today as you can see I created the LO (under the preview) using She's So Trashy Vol.1 even though it's a masculine LO. That's how versatile this kit is and a must have in any digi stash so thankyou so much Hollie!

Does the pain in your heart ever stop hurting? Nope it doesn't but perhaps it just lessens over time or every now and again. I have to be the first to admit that I really am struggling with my son's diagnosis. As much as it has been a huge relief to all of us I am just finding it difficult to deal with it myself. The emotions are quite overwhelming and we are in the hardest and most difficult time, as we have been for years, with it all and just at the moment dealing with the crisis we have been for most of the year. Talking to his assessor this week on the phone made me realise a little more the impact of Lance's own journey and how hard it would be. Sometimes I really wonder if I am built for this kind of stuff, if I have it in me and I seriously don't think any of us can possibly imagine being in those shoes until we have to deal with it ourselves. As much as I want to yell and scream at the world and tell them how unfair this is, I remain quiet and fight the battle internally and I just thank God for the peace and comfort he gives me when I need it so desperately and at the moment I need it constantly.
I often wonder if I am doing the right thing when it comes to blogging about our family and some of the issues we deal with on a daily basis, in particular my son Lance's diagnosis of Autism. For me blogging is my memory, a place I can be myself and put my thoughts into words, a place others can come and share in those thoughts and where those I know who read my blog and like to keep up with the latest news.....can! Yep it sure is out there for all the world to view and as much as I am fully aware of that, I hope that by blogging about our journey as we know it now will in some way be a positive tool for others in difficulty as well and that by telling our story we can be there for others in their time of need and that they too will manage to hang in there knowing that others are going through similar situations. There is light at the end of the tunnel although at times it appears to be further away then others and sometimes we need to take many steps backwards in order to move forward but knowing what we have been through, what we are going through and what is before us can make all the difference in how we manage from one moment to the next and if that's all we can do.....then it's doable!
I wish everyone a great weekend and whatever you plan to do, do it well! Take care, stay safe, tell a loved one how much they mean to you and spend some time resting and relaxing. Hugs Chris xoxo

3 comments:

janedoe said...

Hi Chris, I always pop by and read your blog and I too am always a bit worried about whether I share too much with the outside world when I blog but to me, it's my little release to express myself and if someone else gets something from it, that's great too. I admire how courageous you are in all the things life has dealt you. There is no way I can empathise with you as i haven't been through anything like that with my family. I have separated nearly 2 years ago and have two toddlers under 5 and a half so use blogging and scrapbooking as my therapy to record my feelings and emotions through this creative outlet. Without scrapbooking, I don't think I would have pulled through to the point I am now. I still have many bad days (many of them) with my 2 very active boys, but I'll sit and blog or create a layout to take my mind off things, even though I have created some layouts that are delving right into why I am in the situation I am in today. I just love your layout using Hollie's kit too. Stay positive and keep close to your family. [hugs] Sharon in Melbourne.

Mel said...

oh Chris, what you are feeling is normal, it is hard, it does hurt, it will get a little better with time though.
I don't think there is a right or wrong, I do think you will be helping others going through similar things though.

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