blergh...

that's seriously how i feel right about now...blergh!!! mondayitis?! seriously the past few days have been quite eventful and quite full on. so i've had no choice but to prioritise things for now and put things into retrospect. we have a child in crisis at the moment and i'm not at all surprised. new year, new school, new year level, new teachers, change in all that and then the friendship circles she usually sits on the edge have also changed. 

the school messed up her timetable, teachers, subjects and of course the bullying started. this is now officially the 3rd week of yr 11 for stephanie but it has not gone off too well and in amongst all the change, stress and anxiety she crashed and burned a little over a week ago, then decided she would try school last thursday and pretty much crashed and burned a little more serious with the school health and well being counsellor calling me. steph was in a pretty bad place mentally and emotionally and he was very concerned for her safety.

so last friday morning was the 1st of 2 meetings...this one was with the school counsellor putting together a plan for her safety and well being, the need to put an end to the bullying once and for all or we take it to the police and then after that it was time for the 2nd meeting for the day with our new family case worker from st lukes. inbetween all this was the urgent phone calls to her doctor, the possibility of a hospital visit and being very very very vigilant.

today was more phone calls, referrals and another home visit from the family case worker too. the wonderful news is steph was able to open up a little to the family worker....tim and i were quite shocked to be honest as today was the 1st time she met him and today i was not expecting anything more then just a plain and simple hi in passing if that at all. now 1st up 3 good helpful reasons for this was...family worker was in stephs safe place and environment...yes here at home. family worker is a male...yes she seems to be able to relate better with the species and 3rd she realises she is desperately in need of help. this is a really really good and positive outcome.

what was even better though was afterwards...yes once the family worker had gone home and she had time to process what took place i went in and asked her what she thought of our new worker...she thought he was quite nice and he had nice blue eyes and not creepy like the others!!! to anyone who lives with someone on the autism spectrum you would know that this is positive...extremely positive because it's great that we get support but if its not the right support then it's all totally pointless and furthermore if our kids can't relate to that person at all then nothing we do will improve on that. this is positive!!!

 

everything takes a back seat when you have a child in difficulty, everything takes a back seat when you have a child in crisis, everything takes a back seat when you can't let that child out of your sight 24/7 in fear of what they might do....everything including your own life takes a serious back seat because there are priorities and needs greater then anyone elses on this earth, because when you get out of the numb feeling and reality hits you like you can never imagine, the final words that come out of your mouth to the those you need to speak with and to those who need to know are...i'm not losing my daughter because someone else caused her harm...i'm not losing my daughter because those idiots won't stop bullying and tormenting her, i'm not losing my daughter and once again i will fight for her rights and i will fight to keep her here.

i am tired of seeing her in pain and anguish, i'm tired of seeing her suffer at the hands of others and i am really fed up with how degrading and how disgusting these people make her feel. no more...it stops here and now!!!

life moves on...sometimes in ways we would rather prefer not, sometimes in ways that seem ok. life is a journey, one that is unique and necessary to each and every one of us. however the journey of life is the same for all, just how we choose to walk it, how we choose to overcome the obstacles and how we choose to be part of it will all depend on what we feel is important and most of all what we feel and know is right. our experiences, our knowledge and our strengths all have a part to play, what we value, what we bring and more importantly how we bring it all together for the good and benefit of others. life is precious and it is worth fighting for...every single breath of every single day!!!

hugs chris xoxo